Since my arrival in British Columbia the first few weeks were spent job hunting and telling myself not to be picky about what type of employment I can get. While I was aiming for retail jobs to further expand my growth and knowledge in the sector, it was on the back burner (so to speak) that if retail jobs didn't work that I would go back to…. dare I say it FAST FOOD.
So I've written in a previous blog about ADHD friendly jobs and how working in a Fast Food job not being ADHD friendly. That blog was written in a very negative context. I guess what makes working in the Fast Food service different this time around is that I'm using previously gained experience.
The place of work is enjoyable. The co-workers are great with the exception of three of who I'd rather not work with (they lack work ethic) but sometimes have to work with them because of scheduling. Thankfully Management has clued in and these co-workers are starting to pull their weight more.
Also, when I first arrived here retail jobs were only offering 15-20 hours a week, realistically impossible to survive on here in Victoria. A person needs 35 plus hours a week to survive. The cost of living here is really high. At my Fast Food job I'm getting 35 plus hours a week. Soon approaching the end of my three month probationary period. Hopefully, the manager will give a good review and maybe I'll be entitled to a wage increase.
Every once in a while I'm checking what other jobs are out there. However, of what I've been noticing on the job boards are positions offering less hours than what I'm currently getting. Which means stay at the job I'm at for right now and just keep looking. Something better will come along someday…maybe.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Recent Life Changes
Originally written on August 20, 2012
Since my last blog I've been working really hard to make some positive changes in my life. Progress has been made even though there is much more to be done.
I've been been working really hard on relationship building. Doing whats important with my loved ones. In some ways despite "not being completely there" I'm becoming more "in tune" with trigger points most times. There's still occasions when loved ones feel the need to point out to me that "I'm in my own world", that I have to snap out of it.
Getting back to life changes that have happened recently. Allow me to fill you in on the details. First, it was the preparation in getting ready to move back to British Columbia. I had to compile a "To-Do List" of things that had to be accomplished to make the move possible.
Keep in mind that I was still working during the day, raising my son and helping him to stay on top of his school work. My Mom has been an enormous help through all of this. This moving "To-Do List" was done in the evening time after work and on my days off.
Planning this move was a huge responsibility that required a lot of planning, organizing and maintaining focus. I was able to to do this while working full time. It is an accomplishment that I feel really proud of.
Since my last blog I've been working really hard to make some positive changes in my life. Progress has been made even though there is much more to be done.
I've been been working really hard on relationship building. Doing whats important with my loved ones. In some ways despite "not being completely there" I'm becoming more "in tune" with trigger points most times. There's still occasions when loved ones feel the need to point out to me that "I'm in my own world", that I have to snap out of it.
Getting back to life changes that have happened recently. Allow me to fill you in on the details. First, it was the preparation in getting ready to move back to British Columbia. I had to compile a "To-Do List" of things that had to be accomplished to make the move possible.
Keep in mind that I was still working during the day, raising my son and helping him to stay on top of his school work. My Mom has been an enormous help through all of this. This moving "To-Do List" was done in the evening time after work and on my days off.
Planning this move was a huge responsibility that required a lot of planning, organizing and maintaining focus. I was able to to do this while working full time. It is an accomplishment that I feel really proud of.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Relationship Building
In a previous blog I wrote about how my partner and family do not enjoy watching me struggle with ADHD; the inconsistencies, not maintaining focus and not helping myself "tune into" trigger points.
The most important thing I didn't mention is trust. Trust is one of the most important factor of any relationship. Without trust you have nothing. Well, I've broken the trust of my loved ones. Made numerous promises and not backed them up. So now the road to re-building trust is not an easy one, for the simple fact of not maintaining focus, not giving it top priority like I should.
The biggest thing that I'm supposed to be doing to build relationships that I'm not doing is initiating conversations in order to avoid slide backs. Initiating conversations about the hurtful things I've done and haven't taken ownership of but must. I'm also supposed to be expressing my feelings instead of keeping them bottled up. I must become better in loving myself so that I will improve upon rebuilding trust by proving that I'm worthy of being trusted. All by becoming better at communicating.
The most important thing I didn't mention is trust. Trust is one of the most important factor of any relationship. Without trust you have nothing. Well, I've broken the trust of my loved ones. Made numerous promises and not backed them up. So now the road to re-building trust is not an easy one, for the simple fact of not maintaining focus, not giving it top priority like I should.
The biggest thing that I'm supposed to be doing to build relationships that I'm not doing is initiating conversations in order to avoid slide backs. Initiating conversations about the hurtful things I've done and haven't taken ownership of but must. I'm also supposed to be expressing my feelings instead of keeping them bottled up. I must become better in loving myself so that I will improve upon rebuilding trust by proving that I'm worthy of being trusted. All by becoming better at communicating.
Monday, March 19, 2012
The Positive & Negative Aspects of Medication
My journey with ADHD so far has been a real eye-opener. From the relief of finally being diagnosed to
figuring out which medication would best help me to manage my symptoms.
Medication for AAD/ADHD come in two main classes: the stimulants and the antidepressants. Because
I've been diagnosed with the inattentive type of ADHD my psychiatrist started me off with a stimulant called Ritalin, 10 mg three times a day. I tried this doasge for a week and during this time my mood swings were out of whack, loss of appetite, had trouble sleeping. Work schedule at the time and remembering to take the medication when required didn't really work for me because I would forget sometimes. The worst reaction of all was the drastic drop in body weight. Feelings of being focused, ready to tackle daily life was more like "being high as a kite", similar to someone "being high" on illegal drugs. Something I've never tried. The next drug that I tried was Dexedrine but the weight loss continued and it caused me to be on edge, paranoid all the time. Feelings of always having to be looking over my shoulder. Dexedrine wasn't very helpful in helping me to manage my symptoms.
After being on Dexedrine for a week back to the doctor I go to let him know that I need to try something else. My son was diagnosed with ADHD months before me and his pediatrician started him on the slow release form of Ritalin right from the start. I knew it was working for him so why wouldn't it work for me also. I shared this information with my doctor and asked if I can finally start on the same medication as my son. The slow release form of Ritalin known as Biphentin.
At first it was a matter of determining the right dosage amount to help me manage the symptoms. Currently, I'm taking 50 mg every morning followed by 10 mg immediate release Ritalin at 4 pm to give me an extra boost to stay focused in the evening. This dosage works for me, my biggest struggle has been to re-gain the weight previously lost when first starting on medication. I've re-gained my appetite, any time of day when I feel hungry I'll eat. As for my weight, despite not gaining as fast as I would like too, I've been able to maintain it.
Currently, I'm waiting for an appointment to speak with a registered dietician to see what suggestions he/she can offer with regards to diet in order to gain weight in a healthy way. Perhaps my metabolism could be the reason why I struggle with weight gain? Who knows? My only regret is not asking to seek advice from a dietician a lot sooner. I feel this meeting will be beneficial in helping to better manage ADHD. I will try whatever the dietician suggests with an open mind.
figuring out which medication would best help me to manage my symptoms.
Medication for AAD/ADHD come in two main classes: the stimulants and the antidepressants. Because
I've been diagnosed with the inattentive type of ADHD my psychiatrist started me off with a stimulant called Ritalin, 10 mg three times a day. I tried this doasge for a week and during this time my mood swings were out of whack, loss of appetite, had trouble sleeping. Work schedule at the time and remembering to take the medication when required didn't really work for me because I would forget sometimes. The worst reaction of all was the drastic drop in body weight. Feelings of being focused, ready to tackle daily life was more like "being high as a kite", similar to someone "being high" on illegal drugs. Something I've never tried. The next drug that I tried was Dexedrine but the weight loss continued and it caused me to be on edge, paranoid all the time. Feelings of always having to be looking over my shoulder. Dexedrine wasn't very helpful in helping me to manage my symptoms.
After being on Dexedrine for a week back to the doctor I go to let him know that I need to try something else. My son was diagnosed with ADHD months before me and his pediatrician started him on the slow release form of Ritalin right from the start. I knew it was working for him so why wouldn't it work for me also. I shared this information with my doctor and asked if I can finally start on the same medication as my son. The slow release form of Ritalin known as Biphentin.
At first it was a matter of determining the right dosage amount to help me manage the symptoms. Currently, I'm taking 50 mg every morning followed by 10 mg immediate release Ritalin at 4 pm to give me an extra boost to stay focused in the evening. This dosage works for me, my biggest struggle has been to re-gain the weight previously lost when first starting on medication. I've re-gained my appetite, any time of day when I feel hungry I'll eat. As for my weight, despite not gaining as fast as I would like too, I've been able to maintain it.
Currently, I'm waiting for an appointment to speak with a registered dietician to see what suggestions he/she can offer with regards to diet in order to gain weight in a healthy way. Perhaps my metabolism could be the reason why I struggle with weight gain? Who knows? My only regret is not asking to seek advice from a dietician a lot sooner. I feel this meeting will be beneficial in helping to better manage ADHD. I will try whatever the dietician suggests with an open mind.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Handling a crisis without feeling overwhelmed
From personal experience along with information obtained by reading regularly on the internet, I've come to the realization that there are more people in the world besides myself who are ADHD and don't like to be in situations of constantly feeling overwhelmed.
A health crisis occurred in my family in recent weeks and I had no choice but to step up my game knowing the extra responsibilities placed on me, there was no time for me to feel overwhelmed for anything.
It was a Thursday morning, my family and I were up going about our morning routine like we always do. Everyone was feeling normal no cause for concern right? Well it wasn't until my mother was getting her coat from the closet to leave for work that the day quickly changed from normal to "oh my god"!
Just as my mom got her coat from the closet, she had to immediately sit down on the coach. She had one hand on her chest, tears streaming down her face. So right away I asked "Mom are you okay?". She said "No, my chest feels tight, can hardly catch my breath". "I feel pain shooting out through my back and up my right arm". "I have no feeling in my right arm".
As soon as she explained to me what was going on I knew it was the signs of a heart attack. Dad was outside shovelling snow so I told Mom to stay put. I went to the door called out to Dad and explained Mom's situation, that he should take her to the hospital right away. He did just that.
At the hospital after a day of numerous tests. It turned out to be a mild heart attack which meant my mom had to spend a few days in hospital to be monitored and more testing. Going to St. John's for a dye test (cardiac catheterization) to determine how much damage had been to done to her heart and check for blockages. She's extremely lucky not to have any blockages.
During Mom's hospital stay I had full responsibility of keeping the house functioning, working, managing my own ADHD, keeping my son on track with his ADHD, his schoolwork, visiting mom at the hospital, and dealing with my dad who is unwilling to deal with reality.
I'm proud to say that there were tiny brief moments at night where feelings of being overwhelmed became feelings of being over tired. I was able to maintain focus on the important things. Proving to my mom that she can rely on me to come through for her in a crisis, like she has done for me. My mom's heart attack caused me to 'wake up' and see things in a different perspective.
A health crisis occurred in my family in recent weeks and I had no choice but to step up my game knowing the extra responsibilities placed on me, there was no time for me to feel overwhelmed for anything.
It was a Thursday morning, my family and I were up going about our morning routine like we always do. Everyone was feeling normal no cause for concern right? Well it wasn't until my mother was getting her coat from the closet to leave for work that the day quickly changed from normal to "oh my god"!
Just as my mom got her coat from the closet, she had to immediately sit down on the coach. She had one hand on her chest, tears streaming down her face. So right away I asked "Mom are you okay?". She said "No, my chest feels tight, can hardly catch my breath". "I feel pain shooting out through my back and up my right arm". "I have no feeling in my right arm".
As soon as she explained to me what was going on I knew it was the signs of a heart attack. Dad was outside shovelling snow so I told Mom to stay put. I went to the door called out to Dad and explained Mom's situation, that he should take her to the hospital right away. He did just that.
At the hospital after a day of numerous tests. It turned out to be a mild heart attack which meant my mom had to spend a few days in hospital to be monitored and more testing. Going to St. John's for a dye test (cardiac catheterization) to determine how much damage had been to done to her heart and check for blockages. She's extremely lucky not to have any blockages.
During Mom's hospital stay I had full responsibility of keeping the house functioning, working, managing my own ADHD, keeping my son on track with his ADHD, his schoolwork, visiting mom at the hospital, and dealing with my dad who is unwilling to deal with reality.
I'm proud to say that there were tiny brief moments at night where feelings of being overwhelmed became feelings of being over tired. I was able to maintain focus on the important things. Proving to my mom that she can rely on me to come through for her in a crisis, like she has done for me. My mom's heart attack caused me to 'wake up' and see things in a different perspective.
ADHD & Relationships
Relationships between two adults can be difficult at its best. Now throw ADHD into the mix whereby one partner has it and the other partner don't and it's a completely different complexity altogether.
I'm in such a relationship being the one with ADHD and my partner doesn't. He's one very special man, for not only does he have me as his ADHD partner but my son who is ADHD as well. My son is from a previous relationship before my current partner and I met.
It hasn't been easy for my non-ADHD partner to watch me flip-flop all over the place. It frustrates him to no end, seeing me not being consistent for more than 3 days, not backing up promises made. The biggest frustration of all is my lack of communicating, espeically about the important things related to our relationship. When I communicate it tends to be of a selfish and self-centered nature, never acknowledging his feelings or concerns. Often times I'm very quick to accuse him of not listening to me, when it's usually me not listening to him.
Throughout it all, from diagnosis to being on medication, learning to accept ADHD, still learning to control it, the relationship has many positive moments as well as negative ones. I choose to think of the positive instead of negative. It's all the wonderful things my partner does for me and my son. The little and big things he does to show how much we mean to him, despite us (my son & I) having ADHD is why he is such a speical wonderful man. Words cannot describe how much he means to us.
I'm in such a relationship being the one with ADHD and my partner doesn't. He's one very special man, for not only does he have me as his ADHD partner but my son who is ADHD as well. My son is from a previous relationship before my current partner and I met.
It hasn't been easy for my non-ADHD partner to watch me flip-flop all over the place. It frustrates him to no end, seeing me not being consistent for more than 3 days, not backing up promises made. The biggest frustration of all is my lack of communicating, espeically about the important things related to our relationship. When I communicate it tends to be of a selfish and self-centered nature, never acknowledging his feelings or concerns. Often times I'm very quick to accuse him of not listening to me, when it's usually me not listening to him.
Throughout it all, from diagnosis to being on medication, learning to accept ADHD, still learning to control it, the relationship has many positive moments as well as negative ones. I choose to think of the positive instead of negative. It's all the wonderful things my partner does for me and my son. The little and big things he does to show how much we mean to him, despite us (my son & I) having ADHD is why he is such a speical wonderful man. Words cannot describe how much he means to us.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
ADHD Friendly Jobs
It is my opinion that working at a fast food restaurant is not a ADHD friendly place to work. Here's my experience from having worked at a fast food restaurant.
Shift Work
Us ADHDer's need consistency and routine. A job that involves working various shift hours makes it difficult to maintain any kind of consistency and routine. The restaurant I used to work at, the hours of operation are from 7 am to 11 pm, seven days a week. I've worked every type of shift when employed there.
Scheduling
Inconsistency with the scheduling made it hard to maintain consistency. Never had the same schedule every week. Not knowing how many hours you would be getting each week made it difficult to work out a budget. Hard to make any type of plans with my family. No quality of life to be able to spend time with my family. Boss not having a set rotating schedule for employees to have weekends off. Boss changing shift on short notice is very inconsistent for someone with ADHD. Having to ask to have a weekend off.
There's more I could write about how fast food restaurants not being ADHD friendly places to work, however, these were my two biggest dislikes.
Despite the inconsistent scheduling and working various shifts, it was a good learning experience because I learned skills that I had never learned before and enjoyed being around most of the people that I worked with. I have since moved on to a more suitable job of working in retail. It's more relaxing, not as fast paced as fast food. The hours are better in the fact that it is daytime hours, only exception is that I'll have to work a 1-9 pm shift on Friday's once every 2 weeks which isn't too bad. The other days my hours are 10 am - 5 pm. Store isn't open on Sunday's my favourite of all. Also, there is a rotating schedule where employees have a Saturday and Sunday off.
So far I'm enjoying my employment at the retail store and not really missing the fast food restaurant. Well, I'll be honest in saying that I do miss some co-workers from the restaurant, most definitely don't miss the hours.
Shift Work
Us ADHDer's need consistency and routine. A job that involves working various shift hours makes it difficult to maintain any kind of consistency and routine. The restaurant I used to work at, the hours of operation are from 7 am to 11 pm, seven days a week. I've worked every type of shift when employed there.
Scheduling
Inconsistency with the scheduling made it hard to maintain consistency. Never had the same schedule every week. Not knowing how many hours you would be getting each week made it difficult to work out a budget. Hard to make any type of plans with my family. No quality of life to be able to spend time with my family. Boss not having a set rotating schedule for employees to have weekends off. Boss changing shift on short notice is very inconsistent for someone with ADHD. Having to ask to have a weekend off.
There's more I could write about how fast food restaurants not being ADHD friendly places to work, however, these were my two biggest dislikes.
Despite the inconsistent scheduling and working various shifts, it was a good learning experience because I learned skills that I had never learned before and enjoyed being around most of the people that I worked with. I have since moved on to a more suitable job of working in retail. It's more relaxing, not as fast paced as fast food. The hours are better in the fact that it is daytime hours, only exception is that I'll have to work a 1-9 pm shift on Friday's once every 2 weeks which isn't too bad. The other days my hours are 10 am - 5 pm. Store isn't open on Sunday's my favourite of all. Also, there is a rotating schedule where employees have a Saturday and Sunday off.
So far I'm enjoying my employment at the retail store and not really missing the fast food restaurant. Well, I'll be honest in saying that I do miss some co-workers from the restaurant, most definitely don't miss the hours.
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